Back to blogging!

Here we were flirting with the man at the next table at Magnolia pancake haus

Grandpa teaching us to play golf (notice she's looking at the doggies instead)

Princess for Halloween

started eating vegetables. didn't like them at first....

learned about Christmas

First steps at 4 months old

lots of tummy time, which apparently is boring

lots of fun with Daddy

learned how to put outfits together

played in mommy's old high school cheerleading skirt

watched football with our cool 'football' helmet

decided that we LOVE bathtime! And splashing is the best part

figured out that we can put our toes in our mouth

went for lots of walks on the sonterra golf course and the apple rock golf course in horseshoe bay with G-pa and Lele

Had a birthday party when we were a month old. We were not happy for this picture

practiced 'thriller' dance moves when Pea was 2 or 3 months old

Pea can also do peace signs in her sleep

here is her beautiful smile. She always has a big open-mouth smile, because that is how her mommy smiles and she learned it from her. Such a happy baby!

The past 6 months has gone by so fast! Tonight I can't sleep for some reason and just started thinking about the blog, which i haven't thought about in forever. So, since I can't sleep I thought I'd do some updating.

First, I have to say something about the whole C-section experience. That was INSANE. I have never had surgery, and so I was super nervous about that, and I was sooooo scared about getting an epidural (have you actually read what it is?? If you do, you'll never want one!) The morning of, I started to go into labor so we went in to the hospital. I laid there for what felt like forever. Around 9 or 10, I felt REALLY sharp pains, definitely not braxton hicks. I told the nurse and they examined me and I was dilated to 4 cm!! I was starting active labor! So the anesthesiologist was called and next thing I know, the dr was giving me meds to calm down because I was started to shake I was getting so nervous, and kevin put on his scrubs suit which made me even MORE nervous...so they wheel me back to the room and...Kevin and I both had the same thought when we walked in: it was like heaven it was SO bright. Everything was white and there were like 20 people in the room walking around in blue robes and the shoe covers, and hairnets and masks...all busy, and i can't explain how bright it was. i've never been in a room SO bright! Then they were going to do the epidural...i wanted to cry i was so scared. but it was nothing like i expected. they give you 4 shots to numb the area, but the shots don't go INTO your body, just the surface of your skin, and they were tiny needles so it was literally like tiny little pin pricks. then it was numb so i didn't feel pain from the epidural needle. Now I had to get a half spinal, half epidural (can't remember why) so this may be slightly different than from what a normal epidural was. I didn't feel any pain, but I could feel what they were doing...hard to explain. I could feel the anesthesiologist 'threading' the tube down my spine. it freaked me out so much i was squeezing the nurse's coat and my knuckles were white. then they laid me down on this super skinny table and i could feel my lower body starting to go numb. it happens slowly and starts in your spine and moves outward and downward. At this point they let kevin in the room. He said I was completely naked from the chest down, which I had no idea because I couldn't feel anything. Remember, there are about 20 people in the room. I couldn't see anything because I was laying down, so I just looked at the ceiling. They tie your wrists to the table outward (as if you're laying on a cross) because apparently some people get so freaked out they reach down to their belly while the dr is doing the surgery. so for about 15 min or so nothing is going on because we're waiting for the doctor (i think?). Then the doctor walks in, with the assisting doctor, and he says a quick hello to me, they take their place on either side of me, and there are these GIANT lights behind them pointed down towards my belly (to see 'inside' of me once they cut you open?) and a small army of nurses behind them. The doctor says 'alright, let's begin' and at that moment the curtain goes up so that Kevin and I can't see what's going on. I guess they use a heated scalpel because then I smell burning flesh (so glad I forgot that smell). I tried to listen to what the doctors were saying, but a million things were running through my mind and all i remember was the doctor asked someone what they were doing this weekend. on my side of the curtain was kevin, the anesthesiologist, and a nurse that was just checking on me and kevin and would look around the curtain to keep me updated. She knew that Kevin and i were real queasy with blood and stuff, so she didn't really tell us too much. She told me when my bag of water broke. I couldn't feel much up until they started to pull her out. I could feel them tugging at her and my body jerked a couple times. Then we heard her cry. That was a very strange moment...because then i realized i'm a mommy and i knew she was ok, but i still had no idea what she looked like. they cleaned her up a little bit and then the doctor announced he was about to bring her around for us to see. i'm expecting a gerber baby, because i have no idea what to expect. He brings her around and she is DARK - almost black full head of hair, dark tan skin, and she was upside-down and HUGE. I know this is awful, but my first thoughts were "that's not my baby, that's a hispanic baby", because that's really what she looked like. kevin is blonde, and i had blonde hair when i was born, and kevin and i have VERY pale skin. and i've never seen a baby with that much hair. it was soo surreal. then kevin started to feel faint and the nurse saw so they stuck him in a corner because he almost passed out, or did pass out. I wasn't really thinking straight, i don't know if its because of nerves or the meds, so i didn't even know where he was until much later. i remember looking back at him and he was PALE. i've never seen anyone lose all their coloring until then, it was so weird. a few minutes later his color started to return to his face. so i laid there on the table for 15 or 20 minutes after they showed her to us, so they could clean me up and stitch me up. this was the worst part of it because i was so anxious and i wanted to hold her and i was tied down to this table and could not feel half my body. and i couldn't even see her. What made it worse, was i could feel them doing weird stuff to me...it felt like they had a vacuum and were vacuuming the inside of my uterus. then they rotated the table so that i was almost facing the floor. i don't know why, to drain the blood out? then the anesthesiologist said she was going to pull the epidural tube out. it felt like cold water running down my back. then they lifted me and put me on a stretcher bed and we went to the recovery room (i don't remember that part). so we were in the recovery room and they gave her to me to hold, and then kevin got to hold her. then my parents and sister came back to visit and see our little pea. it only took maybe 30 min to an hour for all the feeling to return to my legs. then we went to our 'home' for the next 3 days, and pea went to the nursery for her tests. I'll never know what a regular birth is like, because a regular birth after a c-section is super risky. but at least now i know what to expect for the next one!

Harlow is now 6 months and 3 weeks old. She had torticollis which caused her to develop plagiocephaly (don't know if i spelled those right). Basically, she has a tight neck muscle which causes her to lean her head to the left, and sleep on one side of her head for the first few months of her life. This caused her to have a flat spot on her head. If left untreated, it can cause brain damage, but all she has to do is wear a helmet for a few months and that will help 'round out' her head. She also has been going to physical therapy for 2 months now to help stretch out the tightness and strengthen the other side. She's a little behind developmentally, but that is typical for babies with torticollis. We're having some trouble with her helmet too. She has VERY sensitive skin and the helmet leaves very dark red marks on her cheek when she sleeps at night (because she sleeps on her tummy and therefore, on her left cheek) which is not supposed to happen. So we're battling that right now trying to figure out how to get her to wear the helmet as much as possible without leaving red marks. Even though we've had a few setbacks, Kevin and I are VERY blessed with little Harlow. She is an incredible baby. Those few things I just mentioned don't even measure up to all the wonderful things about her. I love going to get her when she wakes up in the morning or after naps. She is SO excited to see me! She gets a big smile and then goes nuts because she's excited! She is such a happy baby. She is always smiling and laughing and I can already tell she is going to be goofy just like her mommy and daddy. Today she was in her pack and play for 'independent play time' and i looked over and she had her hands and her face pressed up against the mesh looking at me. when i looked at her, she got a giant smile and started laughing! She has the funniest facial expressions, and she learns new 'tricks' that are so funny. sometimes i just watch her on the monitor when she's in her crib because she's so funny playing with her 'friends'. For a few weeks she was blowing rasberries all the time. Then after that she stuck her tongue out at everyone (including the dogs), and now she makes a clicking noise with her mouth a lot. Everyday is something new, it's so much fun!! She is not at all interested in crawling, she'll try if we put a favorite toy in front of her, otherwise she'll just lay there. she does LOVE to stand though! And she's gotten really good at walking. Twice i've been holding her hands while she walks, and once time she saw Gus and the other time Bobo, and she starts RUNNING towards them! She scared Gus and he ran into another room. Then she just laughs.

I always said growing up i never wanted kids, but that's because i didn't understand just how wonderful they are.

Originally posted 12/3/2009